Identity Crisis

by 86plot

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1.
Crisis 01:14
... who are you? Let us pray Blessed is the virus that divides us Indeed the mindless shall inherit this And spread the carelessness of caustic prophecy A proud hypocrisy A hivemind in denial We believe in American idols And follow those whose fame is but a title Used to influence the masses And propagate the cycle of indifference Indoctrinate the youth More disciples A pittance for your ignorance You wanted bliss? Repent - seek forgiveness for sins you've committed or witnessed And hid beneath this facade of perfection Do I have your attention? Testify! This confession's the legacy you leave behind The choir to which you preach won't pass judgment And it ain't about them anyway - it's about you So c'mon, out with it Who are you? --- a man / nobody ... let's get on with it - it's sure to be a glorious failure, anyway
2.
No apologies No goodbyes No slamming doors Just taillights On the verge of a relapse Step back, relax Take a breath and count to.......... It's out of reach, but I have a hold Of what took so long to let go So go on and take it all, take it off Take this love - or what it is you call it It's too late, I'm all in I've already fallen Face down on the floor And wanting more Seriously, is that the best you got? Little do you know that I can't stop I wanna be damaged, open Hoping you'll bite your lip and come back to haunt me Can't say that I'm sorry If only you saw me Face down on the floor And wanting more Why'd you have to go? Sinking deeper for the chance That I might be hanging onto what I just ain't got Ever closer to the edge When habits bend, but don't break It's too late Why'd you have to go? Can we begin again? --- nature uses the instrument of human fantasy --- in order to pursue her high creative purpose --- it is in us --- each one of us has within him a whole world of things --- each man of us his own special world --- every true man does not live for the sake of living --- but he lives so as to give a meaning and a value of his own --- to life
3.
Red-handed 02:53
We've hit a critical mass of halfwits Look at the stats In fact, it's practically becoming symptomatic Passive-aggressive tactics Impetuous armchair activists Pathetic I'll see your 'temperamental' and raise you 'rowdy' Then drink y'all under the table Bet - you doubt me? Ain't a matter of vanity Got everything but apathy left And envy has kept my ego in check Walking the fine line between motivation and impediment That's some sentiment - thinking that they're separate Just for the hell of it, get perspective The divide between us actually keeps us connected Hold up, I had my head in the sand I submit that, yeah, we're more similar than different But I don't know the half of it - right? Well, let me play devil's advocate Take me away Ready, set, take me away Delicate sensibility is used to confuse us To convince us that relevant questions are just illusions Public displays of inflection Misdirection Follow the 'N' on your moral compass, you'll find nonsense Let's process what it means to be conscious of consequence Believing in a golden heaven that gave us a grey world We regrettably choose to view in black and white Pay no attention to the man behind the message If sheep outpace the skeptics We'll be left with entire generations completely complacent And overindulgent arguments adjacent to the issues that matter But whatever I turned a blind eye to that when sunset met city lights Vicariously hiding proof of another life I'm guilty, alright Take me away --- if we could see all the evil that may spring from good, what should we do? --- how can we ever come to an understanding --- if i put in the words i utter the sense and value of things as i see them --- while you, who listen to me, must inevitably translate them --- according to the conception of things each one of you has within himself? ... where are you going? what does that mean? --- we think we understand each other - but we never really do
4.
--- can you tell me who you are? Say it again til you got it Say it again til you got it Commit this to memory Say it again til you got it It's the same old game but Play it again til you got it Say it again til you got it Say it again til you got it Hate it again til you want it Spin a broken record Say it again til you got it It's the same old song Sing it again If you're going nowhere Say it again til you got it Over and over Say it again til you got it Say it again til you got it Til you got it ... we've had all this over once before ... do you want to begin again?
5.
Silhouette 02:32
Leave me hangin' Leave me wanting more Save your breath Don't spell it out for me Spare me the details, darlin' Keep me guessing all night long Don't you know not knowing what I got That's what I want I just wanna see your silhouette Leave it to my imagination That's it, just gimme a hint Be the thorn in my side My angel With your crooked little horns holding up your halo Ah dammit, I wanna see your silhouette ... i can't see ... let's have a little light, please? C'mon baby, just let me see your silhouette
6.
Abandon Ship 01:49
Sniffing lines of cocaine sun Taking hits of wind we can't outrun Drowning to survive The tightrope we walk everyday Feels like it could break Tattoos of sin Disaster under our skin Itching for a breath of fresh air again Oh, to be the dust that settles on Faded photographs of first and last laughs I ain't afraid of commitment I'm ashamed of it
7.
Whirlwind 03:54
--- don't you feel that the very earth under your feet --- is sinking away from you --- when you reflect that, in the same way - THIS you --- all this present reality of yours --- is fated to seem a mere illusion to you tomorrow? ... do you understand? (closer to the edge) (pay no attention to the man behind the message) ... you, as yourself, cannot exist (commit this to memory) (wanting more) ... you represent the shell of the eggs you are beating (it could break) (thorn in my side) ... the puppet of yourself! (over and over) (i don't know the half of it) ... i don't understand this (relevant questions are just illusions) (why'd you have to go?) (take a breath) ... well - where does all this take us, anyway? --- the conscience that i have, that each one of us has --- we believe this conscience to be a single thing --- but it is many-sided --- there is one for this person, and another for that --- DIVERSE consciences --- so we have this illusion of being one person for all --- of having a personality that is unique in all our acts --- but it isn't true --- i should like to request you to abandon this game of art --- and to ask you seriously once again --- who are you?
8.
I saddled up to the tap and ordered a Captain and - No, wait - scratch that You know what happened the last time I had rum? Neither do I - shit Make it a Tito's and Diet There's fewer toxins in vodka Or so I've read Either way, there's less regret when demons ain't hangin' overhead And though I say that now I might feel differently by tomorrow No matter though "Ya know that's American made," said dude to my right "I like to ironically make my Black Russians with that, but not tonight" He was chillin' with a pint I asked him, 'What you packin', man - Golden Light?' He said, "Ya know it, right?" I'm like, 'You're my kinda guy - I'll drink to that' He said, "Hey, I served in Iraq - I have pride for my country But one thing I can't understand is how we treat our own "If homegrown is fine for food and wine, why do we export pity? 'Spose we're forgetting the domestic soldiers out on the strip Stripped of the freedom we claim to emit Some are homeless - a few of them I served with Hopeless - trapped in a system that ain't perfect Others peddle opioids and herb shit Cut from different cloth, but soldiers nonetheless Oppressed by the constructs of the street Imprisoned by the hands they were dealt or bad beats They rely on weed as their refuge And that's homegrown, too! Literally, in a basement - it's so easy to do Didja know that kids in school can get their hands on chronic Faster than this beer here that I'm drinkin'? Let that sink in Won't call it a gateway, but they ain't smokin' the schwag we used to Bitchin' 'bout GMOs in their Fruit Loops Yet their souped-up grass has got God-knows-what's-in-it Hold up - gimme a minute" He raised his glass - paused Wiped away the condensation it left on the bar Held a conversation under his breath Drank his beer, what little was left And went on "Speakin' of homegrown - DIRTY politicians Redundant, but I specify for emphasis Reluctant to represent the impoverished Malicious fiction drippin' from their lips And honestly, the dishonesty is hardly new It grew from strong roots that meant better a while back Now the fruit we bear is rotten - reconcile that We've forgotten 'bout the art of compromise And if all we'll ever do is label issues a 'red' or 'blue' thing Then imagine a pendulum swingin' outta control from left to right Couldja stop that clock from breakin' by windin' it tight? No - ya let it settle naturally Back to the center, gradually Ya can't force change, it takes time But the resistance you provide is the catalyst "So stand your ground Don't get distracted by analysis Some folks never change, but they may change their minds Immutability is malleable Ergo - the future is salvageable But only if we reign in the madness Don't leave each other bandaged and broken, Soaked in what we know won't stop bleedin' And for what reason? Because we can? Goddamn, we're better than this! "Look at our kids! We used to trade cards - they're tradin' bullets! And at one time, even THAT would make headlines Now it's parenthetical We're desensitized to this new brand of evil It's spreadin' like cancer Ain't no answer to this 'cept the one that I'm givin' But no one will listen What I gotta do, paint ya a picture? A mixture of truth and implicit bitchin' "Oh, what's my source? Me, of course! I cut the cord long before your cable prices soared Don't need no news outlet jib-jabbin' tellin' me what's goin' on I've been there - I see it every fuckin' day! Because with action comes experience And from experience - perspective And through perspective - reflection And in reflection - wisdom Get off your asses or kiss 'em goodbye Change the world! "Do something - anything! Buy that wedding ring - don't take love for granted! This shit ain't handed to ya - earn it! Learn to walk in another's shoes! What it means to lose someone 'fore it happens to you! Sympathize with each other! Reach across the aisle! Choose substance over style! 'Cause once this is over there ain't no comin' back! Remember that! Save a life - create it - live it! Have compassion, find your passion! Lest you wish you had and don't, trust me Why the hell else ya think I'm sittin' here alone?" His words resonated unmistakably Lately I've taken to deeper thoughts and philosophies And simple as they may be, they make you think logically And objectively Everything he said to me was true I said, 'Man, I just met you But I gotta know your take 'cause I respect you - alright? What's the meaning of life?' He sighed and said, "To provide one" I asked him to clarify - 'A meaning, or a life?' He leaned back, closed his eyes And simply replied, "Yes" Huh - now it all makes sense
9.
Identity 03:06
.-.

about

'Identity Crisis' is a dynamic mashup of original music and dialogue from Luigi Pirandello’s 'Six Characters in Search of an Author', creating a stimulating blend of experimental influences ranging from conscious hip-hop to postminimalism.

​Balancing brash meditation with self-deprecation, the concept album weaves philosophical nuance into a sonic fabric of personal and social awareness. From the heartbreaking reality of dependence to candid commentaries on society’s collective indifference, each track explores themes of soul-searching amid destructive behavior​​ - uniting the pleasure and pain that is inextricably tied to the process and fulfillment of discovery.

credits

released February 22, 2019

Music and lyrics written, produced, recorded and mixed by Bob Benson.
Dialogue written by Luigi Pirandello and recordings distributed by LibriVox.
Mastered by Local Legend Recording.

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86plot Iowa

86plot is the solo project of Bob Benson, a producer and composer based in east central Iowa.

Broadly categorized as 'electronic music', each release from 86plot intends to push the boundaries of traditional genres, blending elements of cinematic scores and experimental compositions with conscious hip-hop and commercial pop.
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